Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Randomize
