It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
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