this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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