Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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