Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
