She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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