I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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