She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
