K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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