Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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