did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
