I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize