haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
