I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
