Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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