So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
