I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
