when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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