look no pants
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Randomize
