We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
