I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Randomize
