i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
i need some magic done to my vagina
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
