Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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