At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
