dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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