reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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