i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Girls should come with a carfax report
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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