May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
