I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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