): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Randomize
