Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
