hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
