At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
