I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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