We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
