ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize