well you can't waste a boner
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Randomize
