This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
