You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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