Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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