I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
