Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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