They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
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