I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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