she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Randomize
