"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
