She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize
