the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
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