I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
