don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
