Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
