I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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