I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
